cheenay

SO, I GUESS THIS REALLY IS GOODBYE...

I have no right to demand anything from you now. No right to get hurt and no right to hope. In the onset, we have made it clear already. It could’ve been fine if I didn’t jump into conclusions like you said. But believe me, I didn’t. I knew what I saw & you know exactly what I am talking about. I felt the waves of reality hit me, I desperately retreated in the shadows of denial. “Do you’re research…”, “Abante? Manila bulletin? Tonight?”, “You believed in me, but you never trusted me, change that habit, bye again”, How could I ever forget those lines? I was struck, my tears well up. You’re right, di kita kilala, hindi kita nakilala non. I don’t know whom I was talking to at that time, a very different person - a total stranger. At that time, I wanted to ask you, Where was this guy who were once mine? Si yabi asan? Mahal ako non e, hindi ikaw yan, hindi sya ganon! You made believe you were you. I hate the thought of losing this inner battle with my emotions but denial is now proving to be a useless refuge for sudden realizations and for bitter truths.

Before, I was hoping for a long lasting relationship, more so, of honest and unconditional love. It’s so sad, I never knew it was going to end up this way. I did try to forget you. Hated you, for some obvious reasons. I have tried countless times to cover it up letting go. But the toughest thing about it is that the sting lingers long after the wound has supposedly healed. And yes, I am still hurting. How I wish I could simply forget everything at an instant. But I know time does that for us. It’s still there painful as ever.

About me & my dad, mas close kami ngayon. Sobrang nagsisisi ako kung bat ganon nalang ako sumagot sakanya before. He thought me a lot of things, sobrang dami ng advice. He was my strength at that time. I remember when he saw me crying sa kusina, I opened up to him, muka kong batang inagawan ng candy. Iyak ako ng iyak. He hugged me so tight. I cried so hard as I saw him stare at his little girl, parang gusto nyang sabihin na sana sya nalang yung nasasaktan & not his unica hija. I felt my heart squeeze painfully some more. I couldn’t make myself believe that after all the things that I’ve done & all the things we’ve shared, you still chose to hurt me.

Yeah, I’m all good. Busy sa skool, sa work, sa gym… Oh, about Edward? Yah, he’s good, really nice. Hindi pa sya nanliligaw or anything. Though he’s planning to make ligaw, ayoko pa. I don’t wanna rush into things now, mahirap na. He said he’s willing to wait naman, & I’m glad he respected that. Good thing he wants to meet my family, & friends. I could see he’s sincerity. But it’s just that I’m not yet ready. I want to be fair enough to him. Ayoko naman icompare yung past relationships ko if ever. I won’t hurt him. Never.

Condolence nga pala. Hope maging ok naman papa mo & also your family.
So aalis ka na pala, ingat ka dun. I do hope you’ll be happy sa Mindanao. It’s nice to hear you’ve got your ever loyal friends with you. One-call away lang naman e, malayo man malapit din =). Now I’m not faking it, I do hope for you to be happy inspite of it all. I loved you too much Jazz, too much nagmuka akong tanga! Too much that its hurts so bad! Too much that I allowed you to hurt me through & through! That’s TOO MUCH… & I guess too much is enough.

This is not bullshit. Atleast now, you’ve got the balls to speak up for yourself. Whether it is true or not… bahala na si batman.

Nice to know you’ll be home soon. There I know you would feel so much special, loved, & wanted. Kung di ko man nabigay sayo dati yon, pasenxa na. Everything’s ok atleast. Pag balik mo seksi nako, di na kta papansinin. Joke. When you come back sana kilala mo pa ko, I do hope magkita pa tayo. By that time, all the wounds would mend & I’m sure ok nako non. Sana ikaw din.

Enough of all the hurt. I know I am talking like as if di kta nasaktan. I’m sorry for the words. I realized I have to forgive you, & to forgive myself aswell in order for us to have peace of mind & complete happiness. The pain has now become a familiar dull ache. An ache brought about by missing you so much and relieved only by memories of you & what we once had. It’s not that I regret everything… I just realized that I am no more immune to love than I am to pain. And I have to end all this, like what you wanted. I need to. We had to. I’ll miss you. You will always be a part of me yabi.

So, I guess this really is goodbye….

Sorry for everything…

Bye.

Ex.yb

FLIMSY

By Ecka

We were ok, aren’t we? We were worth a try, don’t you think? We were happy, right? You love me, don’t you? Why do you have to leave me? Why does it have to be this way? Why does it have to end?

I feel so alone.

Maybe its not the right time, or not the right place… but I’d still like to think we were right for each other. Time was against us, against our relationship, and all we could hope for was the right time. Maybe, we'll be together. Maybe then, I'll give the love back, even just a little. I know I do sound pathetic. But I can’t deny, every passing day it hurts and it hurts even more. Knowing that soon, you’ll be leaving. Soon.

And now, I cherish every moment. I relish it like as if it was the last. That’s why I find it hard to part ways everytime we had to go home. I don’t want to let go of your hand. Cause it feels like it’s going to be the last…

Five years from now, I might see you again. Not as my bf, not as mushy you used to be. Not as yabi, my buddy, the one who always make inis then tells me “cute ng baby ko”. By that time, you’d be holding someone else’s hand. Cuddling, laughing, sharing, how sweet, isn’t it? I couldn’t imagine, where would I be? Holding someone else’s hand as well? Startled with what I saw or probably alone, thinking about you, and what could have been?

I wish to tell you everything. How I felt, how I’ve cried, and how many times I’ve died. But as you said, don’t get so affected with what’s happening. Don’t get so emotional cause only fools do such. How could you easily say that? Were you brave enough to handle things without the stupid me? Or were you tired enough with all these pretensions?!? I am emotionally attached. I am weakened with every single word you say. I am distressed, awfully at my lowest point in life. Wretched from all the hurt, that is happening around me. I am lost without you. I wasn’t just emotional, cause I was carried away by my feelings. That’s not it. Call me a fool, but atleast I wasn’t pretending. This is what I am feeling & this is what I am. A fool. Blinded by sentiments & all the memories I have with me. Yes, unlike you… I am fragile.

I based my emotions not by some silly quotable quotes forwarded by whoever that is. I don’t want to have any regrets on doubting, and stopping myself from loving you. I have loved you for who you are, and what you’re not. I’ve read things I shouldn’t have. I feel miserable with just simply viewing your friendster profile. The shout-outs’, comments, half meant lyrics & all. Or am I just paranoid to think it was all for me? Anyways, I don’t know where all the hindrance came from. Were you scared? Were you mad? There must be a reason… tell me. It was worth a try. I was worth a try, was I not?

###"If the person did everything for you, loved you whole heartedly, don't ever let go of that person, for you will realize one day that this person was willing to love forever."###

CATCH-22

By Ecka

Jan.23, ordinary day?

I hope not.

A roller coaster ride full of happy and sad moments yet memorable. Despite the hardships, I am glad were still together and fighting for what was supposed to be ours. It’s just sad that now I am not able to greet you a Happy Monthsary. For some reasons, and it hurts so bad. But then, come to think of it, the days I’ve spent with you was a way more than a monthsary. Everyday I celebrate the chance of making you feel loved and wanted, despite all the hindrance. I’d rather not have a monthsary than a day without you.

I wish I could relieve the pain through crying. I wish sleeping could somehow take me places even for a while. Just so that I could run away from all the no-win situation. I even get a new hair cut, even if I love my hair so much. I tried eating but the food don’t taste that good, even drinking ain’t doing what it should. I’m a hazard to myself.

Fighting a war against the mirror somehow takes the edge off of me. I blame myself for nothing, knowing nothing at all. So fed-up with what was happening. I couldn’t understand why all of a sudden things’ has to change. Maybe I’m still hoping? Or maybe I just don’t want to let go?

Maybe then I’ll understand…

Maybe then all the hurt would mend…

Maybe then I’ll see it’s purpose…

Maybe… then…

####Catch-22 - a situation in which whatever outcome somebody desires is impossible to attain because the rules always work against it.####

Mi Raison d'être

By Ecka360

I do not know how to sum up my feelings. All I know is that everyday hurts like hell. I was cramming out of time, that I have to meet my deadline. I have to accept the fact that sooner or later, you’ll be gone. You’ll be leaving… And I don’t have the assurance that you’d come back. Do you know how it feels to let go when you know deep down inside, your heart is saying no? But then I have to. And it’s killing me, every inch of me.

I know how much you love me. But it hurts knowing that you have to do such things. I could feel your pain. Cuz your pain is my pain. Hush now, baby don’t cry… I will let you unnerve me for awhile. Conk out your fears to me, let me carry all the hurt inside you. You have no idea how much it gets harder each day. Every minute of everyday, every second flies by into my hands. And soon you’ll be gone, out of my life. I may not have enough reason for you stay but just let me… just let me give you reasons not to go. I need you here with me. I need you so bad…

Who’s gonna pick me up? Who’s gonna call me up at night? Who’s gonna be my date? Who’s gonna carry my bag? Who’s gonna watch movie with me? Who’s gonna text me? Who’s gonna argue with me? Who’s gonna make me laugh? Who’s gonna make me cry? Who’s gonna make me feel pretty? Who’s gonna comfort me? Who’s gonna hold my hand? Who’s gonna hug me? Kis me?... Now, who’s gonna tell me I love you back?

These are just some of the questions running inside my head. Simple questions that only I myself could answer. For I know, until now… it’s you, only You.

I miss you everyday… and I miss you even more… ;-(

As tears run down my face, everything flashed back clearly. From the very first day, up to the day when I last saw you. How much I wanted to stop the clock from ticking, just so that I could spend more time with you. How I longed for your cuddles, and sweet nothings. Damn! I miss you. I wish I could tell you how much you mean to me… but words are not enough. . I wish that you could stay but... But more than this I wish you could’ve seen my face. In a phrase to cut these lips, I love you.

ALAS TRES

By Ecka

Tapos na ang lahat,

Pero narito ka parin.

Nangungupahan,

Namamalagi…

Sa aking isipan..

Sawang-sawa na ako

Kakaisip sa lagay mo

Kaawa-awa,

Mukhang gago…

Tama, yan nga “Ako”.

Mahirap magpanggap

Masaya sa umaga

Lugmok sa gabi

Nangungulila

Parating humihikbi.

Suot ang maskara

Sa harap ng tropa

Maligalig,

Nakatawa…

Parang tanga.

Ikaw ang dahilan

Walang pag-aalinlangan

Kung bakit ako’y nahihirapan

Naiwang sugatan

At walang matakbuhan.

Minahal kita ng labis

Ngunit binalewala

Binasura

Tinalikuran

Isang kang lapastangan!

Sa kabila ng lahat

Hinangad ko ang iyong kaligayahan

At nawa’y iyong matagpuan

Pagmamahal na ninanais

Sa akin ay di natagpuan.

SHOULD I? COULD I?

By Ecka

In a sea of angsty and melancholic alternative rock fans, I still pass out over love songs with unsurprising and sating (read: kakila-kilabot) love-conquers-it-all themes. I get kilig over mushy chick flick lines, and get teary eyed easily. Feeling ko kasi even if I’m not in the scene, isa ako sa bida sa bawat eksena. Yah right, I once was chosen to join the bandwagon of bitter cynics who abominate love, and be disgusted by mush. May paganu-ganun pa?! Ang chaka-chaka, duh!?

I’ve wavered before, seen hearts get broken and experienced heartbreak myself. It wasn’t that easy ofcourse, and it wasn’t fun at all. A bit odd, but involuntarily tears came running inevitable as I stare at the corner. What’s wrong with me? I’ve done my part, but it wasn’t enough…for him, still I wasn’t enough. Out of the ordinary, I started arguing with myself, blaming with nothing... knowing nothing at all. 

         

        The sparks of romance turned into fuel fires, butterflies in my stomach started churning, and wobbly knees turned into cold shoulders. My heart was broken. My eyes swollen in post-bawl trauma; seen and heard things I shouldn’t have.

After buckets of tears cried over “The One Who Didn’t Seem To Notice”, “The-one-who-must-not-be-named”, and “The One Who Took Me For Granted”. I felt like giving up, and got scared to fall again so deeply. And until now, bitbit ko ang takot na yon. Tang ina lang.

Its so true: Love reality bites – and bites harder.

I’ve had my share of dateless nights, no telebabads, and empty cp inboxes. Walang “San ka na?”, “Nakauwi ka na?”, “Maen ka na?”, “Miss mo ko?”, “amishu”, “Ayabyoo”. Wala. Walang wala! Tang I! Kakamiss! I’ve been envious to sweet couples in the mall, lalo na pag PDA sa escalator. I’ve endured nosy friends “Bitter parin?!?” hirits. I’ve hugged my pillow tightly, cried as I picture him in my mind, whispered sweet nothings to it, kissed it goodnight. And despite the lack of a lover, I still find so much reason to look up to romance.

Until you came along… you popped up from nowhere! Kabute in the house.

~Kring! Kkkkkkriiiinnnggggg! (fone rings)~

“Hello? Pwede po kay Mica?”

“Yes? ^_^”

“Kumain ka na?”

Whoops! Parang kinikilig nanaman ata ako… masamang seyales ito.Pakshet! Pag ibig in da flesh?

Should I? Could I?

HAPPY VALENTINES, EX..

By Ecka

“Ex, Happy Valentines! (NAKANA! )”

Pag nga naman wala kang magawa, at pilit na walang tigil ang kukote mo sa kakaisip ng walang katuturang bagay (best example, ang EX mo). Wala na ngang kwenta, ngunit nabibigyang kulay parin ng isang talentadong fine arts student na katulad ko. Ang yabang ko talaga! Tang ina! Hahaha!

Oh well, what can I say? As usual, wala nanaman akong magawa, kaya’t titirahin ko nalang ang pinakamamahal kong EX! ehehe! Oo, titirahin kita! TITIRAHIN KITA! Abangan mo ah? (bading?) Nice one…hahaha! Mabasa nya kaya ‘toh? So what?! “Hoy Gago! I miss you!”, wakekek! Sweet ‘ko noh?! Eto na boi… eto ka!

Bitter pa ba ‘koh hanggang sa ngayon? Malamang… siguro… ewan… malay koh?! Ano sa tingin mo? Oo. Apir! Mahal ko kasi yung putang inang yun eh! Again again again…! Yung PUTANG INANG yon! Ahaha! Ano kayang iisipin nya kung mababasa nya ‘tong pinagsususulat ko? Siguro sasabihin nya, “Kawawa naman ang isang ‘toh, desperdo”. Pwes, PUTANG INA mo again! Ahahaha! Pathetic ba ‘koh? Otistic lang! Este, artistic lang boi… hindi lang sa artwork ‘koh nailalabas ang 100 pursyento ng impact mo, pati sa pagiging makata ko… ay nanatiling epal ka sa mundo ko. Ikaw ba, kaya mo ‘toh?

Halos 10 buwan narin akong single. Hindi ko maimagine kung sa paanong paraan ako lalandi sa iba ng hindi papasok sa eksena ang EPAL kong EKS! Lagi nalang akong pigil magmahal dahil sa kakakumpara sa PUTANG INANG yon, Putang ina moh for the fifth time, ahahaha! Ansarap-sarap mong murahin, parang ikaw! Dati kasi masarap ka eh, malamang ngayon lasang sapal kana. Ahaha! Pero mahal kitang TANG INA KA! Ahaha!

Ilan na ba ang dapat eh shota ko sa ngayon kung di rin lang ako bitter dahil sayo? Oh ha?! Ang ganda ko ng lagay na yon diba? Pero pumapanget ako pag ikaw na ang bida sa artikulo ko. Badtripah!? Ahaha! Ha’ay! Ayoko namang pasamain ka sa paningin ng iba, nagawa ko na yon sayo dati pa. Katakut-takot na sumbat at mura narin ang inabot mo mula sakin, ok na yon. Naimmune ka na ata. Lilinisin ko rin naman ang reputasyon mo bilang isang tao, kahit tae ka. Hahaha! Hindi ako nagsusulat ng ganito para murahin ka, at murahin ka, at murahin pa… Nagsusulat ako dahil gusto ko. Meh problema ka?

Tandang-tanda ko kung paano mo pinamukha sakin na mali ako, wala akong ginawa kundi lunukin ang mga masasakit na salitang nasabi mo… Umiyak want-to-sawa, manisi sa palyado nating relasyon, kwarto mode, magdrama, makipagtitigan sa crack ng pader, yakapin ang sarili kong unan, tumawa ng walang dahilan, magpaputakte sa lamok, manigaw ng kahit na sino, mag-itsa ng celfone sa pader, magbura ng testimonial mo, makipag-usap sa pikytur mo, I-dial at ibaba ang numero sa bahay nyo, magpagupit ng maikli, magpanggap na napuwing lang sa jeep kahit naiiyak naman talaga, magpuyat ng walang pinagpupuyatan, magmoment kasama ang tropa, magpainom ng libre (octoberfest? Alak pa!), gawing tubig lang ang redhorse, magbulakbol sa eskwela, magwaldas ng pera, magpakalosyang, magpakabitter, magpakabigo at magpakasira ulo hangga’t gusto ko. Lahat yun pinagdaanan ko, dahil sayo. Halos mawalan ako ng bait sa sarili, dahil sayo. At mantakin mong dahil lang sayo… nasira ako. Pwes, noon yun… hindi na ngayon… at hinding-hindi na mauulit pa. Ngayon ko lang napag-isip-isip, hindi ako mali… at lalong hindi rin ako tama sa taong minahal ko ng sobra, ikaw yun. Oo, IKAW.

So, Valentines na ah, may date ka na ba?

PUUUTTTTANG INNNAAA!!!

Ako kasi… meron na. ^_^

MISSIN' YOU

By Ecka

I miss everthing.

Your face, your lips, your smile… almost everything.

I miss that endearing smile that weakens me, & makes me smile too. I miss your beautiful eyes’ that sparkles whenever you started to think of something roguish to do or say. I miss the way you wear your clothes, how you’d mix and match them. Then you’d ask me if it fits you well and you look mabango. I miss how your hair looks like, cause you’d always show-off your maputing-batok (yummy!) & act like Papa Piolo. I miss how you wear your ray ban, you look so gwapo togged up in with that. I miss your idea of wearing your dirty Chuck’s cause you say it looks better on that.

I miss your scent, the way I could still smell you even when you’re already miles away from me. I miss your hands, those hands I know so well. I miss your sweet lips. Oh! And how I miss your kisses’ that gives me that Omigod-were-so-inlove spark. I miss how you’d cuddle me, and tease me “Uy! Bilbil oh?”. I miss your arms, and how I’d love to wrap my arms with yours, then I’d say, “Wag mo na ipitin yung biceps mo, Eeee! Landi mu!”. I miss teasing you “Bansot!”. I miss how you’d move forward at the escalator just so that you would look taller than me. I miss walking hand & hand with you. I miss eating our favorite pizza together. I miss your kayabangans’, as if you had it all.

I miss your unpredictable mood swings. Sometimes so hyper, & at times, super suplado. Oh how I miss your kakulitans’ and kacornihans’, those silly insights of yours that could still crack me up even if it’s baloney. I miss your pakikipagpustahan with your tropa, just so that we could date every weekends’. I miss how you’d tell me love stories of your friends, then okray them afterwards. I miss how I nag at you everytime you put Krypton in a dogfight. I miss our trippings’ and how we get so into it. Laughing trip, super otistic. I miss playing Pinoy-henyo with you, and how you’d ended up winning because of your kadayaan. I miss our kababawans’ . I miss how you could stand playing with my little brother & with his playmate. I miss our petty fights, how you’d let me scream at you & drop you off the phone and never get mad. I miss the way you ask for forgiveness, how paranoid you are whenever I never answer your calls. I miss how you think everything would fall into place even if they don't. I miss how you’d get jealous of other people and my exs’, thinking they might get me away from you. I miss how you’d make me jealous with all those sexy girls but you’d never get a word from me. I’d just cover your eyes and hit you. I miss how you beg for my kisses just like a little kid craving for a chocolate. I miss your calls at unholy hours of the day, each day just to make sure I'm still alive. I miss our bolahans’ and get mushy after.

I miss your voice that always reassures me everything is going to be alright but…

I miss a lot more things about you.

I miss you for what you are and what you’re not.

But you know what I miss most?

Damn! I miss calling you…. Mine.

FED UP

by Ecka

I'm tired of crying and burying myself alive. With the same old person who could make me feel so damn stupid. The one who makes me suffer, and yearn this emptiness like hell. The very person who could make me weep like there's no tomorrow. The only guy who slays me all over again even if I'm already dead. The very person I loved most. Murderer!

So fed up with this shit! I'm about to lose control.

Heck! Thought I've put thru. But then, I was wrong, oh so wrong! Do you have any idea with what you've done to me?!? You headless shit! I seek out when I do not know what I'm seeking. Crave with what I'm lacking but still couldn't find. I tried to fill in this emptiness by fooling around. YES! FOOLING MYSELF AROUND. Cry my ass into bed, and wake up with the same blankness in me. Clowning my friends, when I, myself couldn't find a way to please me. Do you know how much it hurts me?!?

I know there's no coming back. It's too impossible to bring back the pieces of ours. Well maybe you're happy now, not knowing that the one you're with is a friend of mine... a really close friend of mine.

Thing's happen for a reason, and whatever that maybe...

I hope i find my way out.

BITTER

by EcKa

“Whoo! Nako! Muka mo, bitter ka! Bitter!!!”, yan ang madalas kong pang-asar sa bestfriend ko… na madalas nya ring pang-asar sakin.

Naaaliw ako habang nakikita syang nag-eemote dahil sa palyado nyang “Ex”. Hindi mo maipipinta ang mukha nya, nakangiti pero durog sa patama. Tumatawa at gumaganti sa bawat pagkana. Hindi naman ako masama, o sa kung ano. Totoo. Ganung-ganon din ako. Natutuwa lang ako dahil hindi pala ako nag-iisa sa mundo. Marami rin pala kaming sawiang-palad. Ayos yan. Cool.

Mula sa telepono, sa pagtetext, hanggang sa personal – si Ex ang bida. Ang bidang kontrabida sa buhay ng mga sawiang-palad na tulad… ubo-ubo… KOH. Basag! Peste. Hindi naman talaga ganon kamiserable ang buhay sa ert – dati. Habang meh nakakain, meh pera, at nakakahinga… ayos na’ko non. Kaso biglang meh sumali sa eksena. Lalake. Mula non, wala na – panget na. Tulugan na!

Hindi na naman ako galit sakanya. Hindi ko naman na sya minumura maya’t maya sa isipan ko. Hindi ko na sya gano iniisip. Medyo medyo nalang. Hindi ko na sya tinitext o tinatawagan. Hindi ko na sya pinapasama sa tropa ko, at pinalalabas na aping-api ako – tinigil ko na. Napagtanto ko kasing medyo pathetic ang kalalabasan ko. Wag ganon. Kelangan ako ang BIDA. Bakit? Dahil artikulo ko ‘toh, at no choice ka dahil taga-basa ka lang.

Sa mga pinagsasasabi ko, masasabi mo bang bitter ako? Sigurado ka? Syempre “Oo”, walang pag-aalinlangan. Bakit? Bakit hindi.

Hindi ko alam kung mababasa nya ‘tong mga pinagsasasabi ko, at kung anong magiging reaksyon nya. Pero malamang sa hinde – magmagwapo sya. Yun kasi ang fave past time nya – ang isiping hirap na hirap ako maka-move on at mahal ko parin sya hanggang sa ngayon. At kung sakaling yun man ang iniisip nya, MEH TAMA SYA! Pero kung hindi? Meh sapak ako.

Seryoso. Akala ko dati kabisado ko na lahat ng proseso mula sa pinaka-basic. Pero hindi parin pala. Badtrip yon. Akala ko ganito… ganyan… puro akala, akala, akala! Tama, lahat akala ko lang pala talaga. Parang guni-guni at naalimpungatan lang ako. Ilang buwan din akong nanalig keh “Kumpareng Akala”. Maling akala. Kaya nakakadala, nakakawalang-gana at sobrang nakakadismaya.

Kumpareng Akala, Pray for Us!

Noong isang araw, nagvideoke kami sa bahay kasama ang mga kabarkada ko. Habang kumakanta sila ng “Especially For You, Sasakyan kita , Atbp.” Heto ako’t bumibirit ng “Paalam na, You were meant for me, at Kahit Sandali” ni Jennelyn Mercado – Huwow! Ang mais ko, demn! Pero ayos lang, lumalabas namang maganda ang kanta dahil with feelings. Damang-dama ko! Sabay banat ng mga walangya kong kabarkada “IIYAK NA! IIYAK NA!”. Demmet.

Oo, mahirap maging bitter. Apektado ang bawat pagkilos mo bente-kwatro oras. Maya’t maya mo syang maiisip pero wala kang choice kundi ang tanggapin ang katotohanang – tapos na kayo. At malamang, naririndi narin ang tropa mo sa kakapakinig ng kwentong paulit-ulit lang naman entitled– Si GAGO si Ex, at Ako si TANGA. Ano ang ending? Lalabas karing kaawa-awa. Mahirap magpanggap na OK ang lahat kahit gusto mo na magbigti ng patiwarik. Mahirap magpulot ng basag at pirapirasong “IKAW”. Kung kaya lang sana ng Elmer’s glue pagdikit-dikitin ang bubog ko, noon ko pa ginawa. Kaso hinde. Sabi nya nga, “It takes time”. Ang tigas ng mukha. Tama, pero sayang ang oras ko. Papayag ba naman akong malugmok at amagin sa isang tabi? Natural hinde. Kelangan mayabang ako. Hindi ako inire ni Tere para lang sakanya. Nasaktan ako, Oo. Pero hindi nangangahulugang mapipigilan akong tumayo’t magmaganda muli. Alam kong marami pang darating: meh matino gwapo matangkad rakista bansot panget mayaman aliping-sagigilid amoy-Oohlala abnormal macho mabait seryoso timawa kalbo maputi conyo maloko mabaho basura drummer bulag tanga halimaw mataba banal gago, at sana kahit papaano meh totoo (Sige, magpantasya ka Ecka! Magpantasya ka!). Pero sa ngayon, ayoko pa! A-Y-O-K-O!

At kung inaakala nyong meh maibibigay akong payo sa kapwa bitter ko, eh wala kang maaasahan. Kumain kana lang muna ng butong-pakwan o di naman kaya eh yung buong pakwan na mismo. Habang ako’y kasalukuyang nag-iisip kung pano ko papayuhan ang sarili ko at kung pano lalayuan ang nakakaadik na pagpupuyat.

At kung sakali mang ok sila ng babae nya ngayon, e di ok! Huh! Gudluck.

Bitter ba?